I was five chasing you around the garden
picking up green sour apples bruised on one side

I was seven splashing water in a tiny yellow pool
holding your paw like my best friend

I was twelve and did not care
rejecting all invitations from your eyes

I was fourteen learning how to walk again
healing with your head on my wounds

I was sixteen fighting for my dream
crossing the ocean but you remembered my smell

I was eighteen holding you during storm
knowing you can’t see my face

I was nineteen and you were gone
crying because you died when I was away